Case in point :)
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
You would think it's Windsday!
Whenever it gets this windy, I always think about that Whinnie the Pooh movie we used to watch about Windsday :) Good times.
Yesterday was kind of momentous...I met up with Brenna (formerly known as T.W.), and we made peace. Whoa. Relief and more relaxed than I've been in months are my main feelings at this point. To be honest, I was exhausted by all the anger and hate I was holding inside. I think the team weekend in Durango kind of got to me...why would I spend so much energy caring if she even walked into my kitchen?! It's been like 7 months or something since all the $#%! hit the fan, so to speak, and it's time I let go. So yeah, we had coffee, and talked, and I got teary eyed, and then we talked some more, and ended up just visiting and catching up on what we've been doing for the past semester. I immediately, instantly, right then and there, felt like I was back on the team. I've been excluding myself, I know it's been only me that's been doing it. The team would never have had to "choose sides" except that I made them, and of course they "chose" the girl that was actually racing this season...but now it won't be an issue! I can't even begin to describe how much better I feel about life! This coming week at Nationals, this summer, next Fall and Spring can now be spent having fun racing bikes instead of being worried about where she is and who she's talking to, and we can be teammates and cheer each other on. I really feel like this is a brand new start to whatever friendship we may have had before anything happened, and I'm going to do my absolute best to hold tight to all the goodwill and happy thoughts I'm having right now, so that I won't slide back in to the detrimental habits I've had for the past year. Anyway, thought I'd share, I feel really good about it, and I hope the rest of the team can forgive me for all the bad behavior I've displayed, I miss them, they are my family.
Also, Caley and I went on a date last night, it was wonderful! I love getting away from the computers (Caley just got a new one...it's soooooo sweet) and spending a whole evening just talking and enjoying some good Thai food!
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Yesterday was kind of momentous...I met up with Brenna (formerly known as T.W.), and we made peace. Whoa. Relief and more relaxed than I've been in months are my main feelings at this point. To be honest, I was exhausted by all the anger and hate I was holding inside. I think the team weekend in Durango kind of got to me...why would I spend so much energy caring if she even walked into my kitchen?! It's been like 7 months or something since all the $#%! hit the fan, so to speak, and it's time I let go. So yeah, we had coffee, and talked, and I got teary eyed, and then we talked some more, and ended up just visiting and catching up on what we've been doing for the past semester. I immediately, instantly, right then and there, felt like I was back on the team. I've been excluding myself, I know it's been only me that's been doing it. The team would never have had to "choose sides" except that I made them, and of course they "chose" the girl that was actually racing this season...but now it won't be an issue! I can't even begin to describe how much better I feel about life! This coming week at Nationals, this summer, next Fall and Spring can now be spent having fun racing bikes instead of being worried about where she is and who she's talking to, and we can be teammates and cheer each other on. I really feel like this is a brand new start to whatever friendship we may have had before anything happened, and I'm going to do my absolute best to hold tight to all the goodwill and happy thoughts I'm having right now, so that I won't slide back in to the detrimental habits I've had for the past year. Anyway, thought I'd share, I feel really good about it, and I hope the rest of the team can forgive me for all the bad behavior I've displayed, I miss them, they are my family.
Also, Caley and I went on a date last night, it was wonderful! I love getting away from the computers (Caley just got a new one...it's soooooo sweet) and spending a whole evening just talking and enjoying some good Thai food!
.jpg)
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